Saturday, January 16, 2010

Love Shouldn't Hurt

UCF is getting a new provost in June. That’s less than six months away. But, as any reputable therapist will tell you, when you’ve been in an abusive relationship for seven years, the worst thing to do is hop right into a new relationship. Maybe UCF should try to live without a provost for a while. Learn how to “be itself,” make healthy decisions, maybe rediscover some hobbies it used to enjoy before everything got so crazy with Hickey. You know, something rewarding like delivering quality education to its students. And, when you’re in an abusive relationship, you can get really isolated. Wouldn’t it be great if UCF could reconnect with all those faculty and staff it used to be friends with? Sure it will be scary for a while. Hickey always told UCF that he knew what was best for the university, even while he pimped it out to his cronies. It’s going to take a long time for UCF to learn that good leadership doesn’t have to hurt. And, now at this vulnerable time, there’s a really big danger that UCF will just pick another bullying, dishonest provost with a Napoleon complex and anger management issues. It’s hard to break the cycle. The road to recovery will be rocky, but let’s all hope UCF is up to it.

Friday, January 15, 2010

Could Hitt’s Eulogy for Hickey Fit on a Tombstone?

President Hitt on the retirement of his number two guy:

His support for the professoriate inspired a vibrant scholarship of teaching and learning initiative and also created new career paths for university professionals.

I have never ever heard a rank and file professor (i.e., one without administrative aspirations) opine that Hickey has inspired their teaching.

Although I give Hitt most of the credit, Hickey helped usher in the do-nothing lackey administrator as a “new career path for university professionals.”

Hickey did pave the way for short people with Napoleonic complexes to become higher education administrators.*

* I feel I’ve done enough short jokes, but a good friend and uncredited writer for some of my blog posts told me “not to quit until Hickey quits.”

Thursday, January 14, 2010

Happy Trails, Cocksucker

Hickey will retire on June 30th.

Wednesday, January 6, 2010

University of Central Whore Town

I like it when a location that is usually busy is deserted. So, on New Year’s Day I decided to take a run around campus. During my run, I noticed that there are a few nice spots.

The nicest spot is the boardwalk between the Student Union and Health and Public Affairs I. The boardwalk runs through a small forest swamp and is lined with attractive light posts. Hanging from these light posts are tacky banners advertising stuff like Sbarro.

Now, among my complaints against UCF, this one is minor. Nevertheless, these shitty little banners demonstrate that UCF administrators are versatile when it comes to ruining whatever they touch. They are able to destroy academic integrity as well as a pretty boardwalk.

Friday, January 1, 2010

The Dark Side Takes a Physical Toll

So, Hitt is the fourth most powerful person in Central Florida. He beat out a U.S. Senator and three members of the U.S. House of Representatives. Whatever. The thing from the article that caught my eye is that Hitt is only 67. For a wealthy person who has avoided a lifetime of manual labor, he looks like shit.